Invisibleness
I haven’t written anything of substance lately so let me try to do that. What have I been up to lately I ask myself to which I reply that that is a fantastic question of which I do not have a fantastic answer but I will give the answer I have anyway. I have been contemplating what the future might hold for me. I am a very curious person. I like to know information. I would love to know what is in store for my life and what might happen in the next couple of months and years and such. I am excited thinking about it! Sometimes I like to imagine but I try not to do that too much so I don’t give myself the opportunity to be disappointed if stuff I want doesn’t happen. Whatever is meant to happen, will happen and I pray I would mess things up to hinder that!
I am going into my last semester of my fourth year at uni which is unfortunately not my last year and I still have no clue what I am going to do with my life. I know what I love doing, but right now I just can’t see how that fits anywhere. I know that He will show me in due time and I will continue to try to be patient and wait until more of the puzzle pieces become clear.
Ahh, I just received my fitness magazine in the mail. Its funny to think back at when I used to do those competitions. Carrot! Lol. Wow, that would have been 5 years ago now! In some ways, I would love to do that again. And in a way that probably only I will understand, that leads me to my next topic of thought – invisibleness.
Sometimes I wish I was invisible, sometimes I am invisible, sometimes I wish I wasn’t so invisible. They all have their unique moments. But I think to actually be invisible would be awesome! That and being able to read people’s minds – that would be a scary one, especially if people could read my mind! Haha. When I used to sing at my old church, I would always sing on the worship team which would be placed on the floor while my bro would lead from the platform. I was totally happy and comfortable singing on the floor so the attention was not on me. I would have much rather preferred to be behind the curtain and singing so I could be out of sight. Then whenever I would sing a solo, I would have to go onto the platform and would get rather nervous. That’s just me. So I was at Crew the other night and asked for thoughts on something, I felt myself turning so red because I wasn’t prepared to talk in front of people! I’m silly like that and I hope I will get over that eventually. Then at the end of the night, Ben asked me to pray and I had no problem doing that. When I pray though, its just God and I, no one else. I think I need to think about that more when I’m singing so then I won’t get as nervous. Problem with that is then I like to close my eyes and that isn’t good stage presence. I will learn to talk in front of people easier eventually!
I wonder…
I wait…
I pray…
So I should be cleaning my room and finding someone to work for me when I go to Snow Camp and doing anything but sitting in front of this computer – something I do waaaay too much but oh well! I’m on vacation. Its been a nice vacation: I’ve slept so much more than normal, I’ve eaten waaay more than I need (but mmmmm food is excellent!), I’ve gone shopping 7 out of the last 12 days but am totally content to just window shop and I’ve played too many games of Sudoku (why is it that I find a game that I enjoy and no one likes to play with me like Blitz and now this! awww poor me :-p ).
If anyone wants to watch a good movie and doesn’t mind dancing movies, you must watch Step Up!! It is a fantastic movie and has made its way to the top 2 favourite movies of mine. My brother even thought it was a decent movie! And he doesn’t watch movies but he actually watched it with me too!
Ok I think that is enough pointless blabbing for a time. I will continue my evening of being unproductive and enjoying not having homework to accomplish at the moment. Only 4 more days of it so I am going to try to do as much non-school stuff or as much nothingness as I have time for!
I am going into my last semester of my fourth year at uni which is unfortunately not my last year and I still have no clue what I am going to do with my life. I know what I love doing, but right now I just can’t see how that fits anywhere. I know that He will show me in due time and I will continue to try to be patient and wait until more of the puzzle pieces become clear.
Ahh, I just received my fitness magazine in the mail. Its funny to think back at when I used to do those competitions. Carrot! Lol. Wow, that would have been 5 years ago now! In some ways, I would love to do that again. And in a way that probably only I will understand, that leads me to my next topic of thought – invisibleness.
Sometimes I wish I was invisible, sometimes I am invisible, sometimes I wish I wasn’t so invisible. They all have their unique moments. But I think to actually be invisible would be awesome! That and being able to read people’s minds – that would be a scary one, especially if people could read my mind! Haha. When I used to sing at my old church, I would always sing on the worship team which would be placed on the floor while my bro would lead from the platform. I was totally happy and comfortable singing on the floor so the attention was not on me. I would have much rather preferred to be behind the curtain and singing so I could be out of sight. Then whenever I would sing a solo, I would have to go onto the platform and would get rather nervous. That’s just me. So I was at Crew the other night and asked for thoughts on something, I felt myself turning so red because I wasn’t prepared to talk in front of people! I’m silly like that and I hope I will get over that eventually. Then at the end of the night, Ben asked me to pray and I had no problem doing that. When I pray though, its just God and I, no one else. I think I need to think about that more when I’m singing so then I won’t get as nervous. Problem with that is then I like to close my eyes and that isn’t good stage presence. I will learn to talk in front of people easier eventually!
I wonder…
I wait…
I pray…
So I should be cleaning my room and finding someone to work for me when I go to Snow Camp and doing anything but sitting in front of this computer – something I do waaaay too much but oh well! I’m on vacation. Its been a nice vacation: I’ve slept so much more than normal, I’ve eaten waaay more than I need (but mmmmm food is excellent!), I’ve gone shopping 7 out of the last 12 days but am totally content to just window shop and I’ve played too many games of Sudoku (why is it that I find a game that I enjoy and no one likes to play with me like Blitz and now this! awww poor me :-p ).
If anyone wants to watch a good movie and doesn’t mind dancing movies, you must watch Step Up!! It is a fantastic movie and has made its way to the top 2 favourite movies of mine. My brother even thought it was a decent movie! And he doesn’t watch movies but he actually watched it with me too!
Ok I think that is enough pointless blabbing for a time. I will continue my evening of being unproductive and enjoying not having homework to accomplish at the moment. Only 4 more days of it so I am going to try to do as much non-school stuff or as much nothingness as I have time for!
posted by Ashlee @ 3:33 PM
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